The 'need to belong' is a drive that I hear alot in my work, but is also spoken about alot in the media.
When I ask people "how would belonging feel?" The words most used are 'Acceptance' or 'Connected to'.
In society we see the desire to identify through gender, ethnicity, faith, age, food choices etc in order to meet this sense of 'belonging', but where does this end?
Hence the search to "find ourselves" often looks like an external change of place, job, relationship. The film Eat, Pray, Love would be a good example of a portrayal of this.
However this external 'grouping' or 'labelling' creates a false sense of belonging, and in reality a psychological, emotional disconnection from others not in the same 'group' as ourselves.
So "how do we meet this emotional, spiritual need?" "Where is it to be found?" The key is in the feeling of 'Acceptance'. True belonging starts on the INSIDE OF US, in our knowledge of self, and our love/acceptance of all of who we are.... A quick caveat here. Acceptance is not a static thing, it also involves recognition of the need for personal growth, when faulty thinking or beliefs take away from who we truly are (Authentic Self).
We are all unique so the only external group that would fit us all, is the group of one US.
Brene Brown has a great quote "True Belonging only happens when we present our authentic selves to the world. Our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance"
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